Tuesday, March 9, 2010

And Life Goes On

Thank you for the words of encouragement, prayer, and sweet emails regarding my last post. 


God has really been working on me, lately. He has not-so-gently reminded me that I cannot be in control of every aspect of my life. That my timing is not His timing. That my plan is not His plan. He has also taught me much needed humility.


I am beginning Week 7 of me being back in school. While the Mr. and I have both adjusted well to my new schedule, things haven't been as peachy keen in the classroom as I expected them to be. I'm LOVING being back in school. I'm LOVING learning and preparing for my future as a Nursing student.


I have always been an A/B student and have no recollection of having failed at much of anything that I attempt. Thus, I'm sure you can imagine my horror at finding out that I was earning a D in my Organic Chemistry class. With only 3 exams left, the possibility of earning an A was gone, and a B was lofty. After 2 failed exams, it was obvious that although I *thought* I understood the information, clearly, that was not the case.


Last week, I made the decision to withdraw from my Organic Chemistry class. This puts me behind one semester...meaning that I will not be applying to Nursing school next month, which means I will not be accepted to begin my program in July, which means the next cohort to begin will be January 2011.


I do realize that may not seem as devastating to you all as it was to me. I was on and off the phone throughout the day with my mom and my husband, in hysterics. All that money spent on one class, not to be refunded. All of those hours spent studying & sitting in lecture, not to be retained. Devastating. To me, at least.


Over the course of the last week, I have found peace in this decision. This now leaves me additional time to focus on my other coursework, and leaves me re-taking Organic Chemistry by itself, when I can focus solely on this class. And we've decided I will find a tutor to get through. 


My time is not His time. My plan is not His plan. So my prayer for this week has been for God to show me the gifts He has given to me instead of the gifts *I* want to have, to accept my limitations knowing that He put them there for my good, trusting that He will lead me down the path I am to travel. Should that gift, that path, be Nursing--wonderful! And if it isn't, I pray that He will show me what it is. 


I realize that I will be misunderstood because I'm choosing to allow God to lead me down the path I am to follow...but obedience to God trumps misunderstanding from friends. Rest assured, I am NOT giving up on my dream of becoming a nurse. I'm just doing my best to put my faith and my trust in Him, that He will show me the way. 

6 comments:

  1. Love that last paragraph, girl. Oh, how sweet the reward when we trust the Father first and foremost. Life is but a fleeting moment, and the peace that takes place in our hearts when we believe that He is the author and perfecter of our faith? Priceless! He'll lead you down that right path, there is no doubt about it! And those who will misunderstand, we hope experience the goodness that we know as His faithfulness, so that they too can realize it's totally worth it. Blessings, sweet lady!

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  2. Ohhh your honesty is convicting!! My life verse/marriage verse is ECC 3:11 "HE MAKES ALL THINGS BEAUTIFUL IN HIS TIME."

    It will be beautiful dear... truly beautiful in the way God wants it best. His timing! Hang in there :)

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  3. God has something amazing in store for you, glad all isn't going as planned but good job for hanging in there!

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  4. What a beautiful post, Mrs. Lukie!! What a life of faith and grace you bestow!! You keep your head up! He knows. He understands! Way to be an awesome example.

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  5. beatifully written dear I have missed you.

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  6. You are a wise lady to obey God. His ways are not our ways, they are so much higher! Blessings, Sarah!

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